Culled from our Facebook page:

FOR SALE: Urban Oasis in the Heart of Poultry Paradise!

Welcome to 473 Greasewood Lane — a once-residential gem now proudly nestled in the fried chicken capital of our unincorporated area! Why settle for peace and quiet when you can have the soothing hum of six competing deep fryers and the comforting glow of neon “$1.99 Combo” signs 24/7?

Highlights include:

Vintage Charm: Lovingly neglected by Sacramento County for decades! This home features the rare and historic “grandfathered blight” aesthetic — a testament to what happens when urban planning takes a multi-decade nap. Zoning? Who needs it. It’s not “code-compliant,” it’s code-resistant. A true relic of government oversight gone beautifully AWOL.

• Natural Light: Generously provided by the constant headlights from the Chick’n-Blast across the street. Enjoy ambient lighting from their 5 a.m. breakfast rush to their 3 a.m. “Midnight Munchies” hour.

• Prime Location: You are literally surrounded on all sides by drive-thru lanes. Forget Uber Eats — just open a window and catch a whiff of tomorrow’s clogged arteries. You’ll be able to identify which chain is frying what with your eyes closed within the first week.

• Soundscape: White noise is out, drive-thru speaker static and sirens are in. It’s like living in the middle of a poultry-based symphony, conducted by teenagers with expired learner’s permits.

• Appreciating Neighborhood: And by appreciating, we mean appreciating the irony. Property values are…stable, in the same way a Jenga tower is stable right before the last piece is pulled.

Asking $299,999, or best cash offer from someone who’s made peace with irony and dreams of living in a place where the air smells like fryer oil and forgotten ambition.

Act fast — before the 5th chicken place opens and drives demand even higher!